hey! its sal’s blog!

"there are tons of things you cant exactly tell your friends when u talk to them,but somehow you have the guts to write them in ur blog even tho it’ll be read by everyone including these very same friends.strange,isn’t it?" -professor ateqs

herm..this new post maybe to some people its just UNINTERESTING BLABBERING of mine. huh..lantak. aku tak kesah. well, blog is created to publish our thoughts n that’s the point. i just want to write as much as i can to burst all the things that i kept inside my heart which is somehow tends to killing me! (duh…exaggerate gel..) but still i’m not very happy rite now.so,saper yg nak baca, baca. saper yg tanak sudah. im not forcing u. (pergh…sounds rebellious gle…:P) this past few days im glad that i had gone through my bad day with such an improvement attitude. I started to accept things dengan redha, be stronger than before n also learned how to manage certain things independently without the help of my parents. Yeah, I’m quite proud of myself coz finally I succeed in throwing away some of my bad attitudes.

If u gain something, u have to lose something. At this particular moment, I think the quote suits me well. Becoz there is a price that I have to pay for all these lessons. N the price is the loss of trust from my parents on me. Since the day im losing my hp, I rarely have conversation with my parents esp my dad. I know he was totally disappointed with me. I personally don’t have the guts to talk to him. N my dad plak seems mcm still bengang+kecewa with me up until now.I feel so sad and lost in my own family.Every conversation I had with dad, he will mentioned bout money n stuff. Oh…that’s so torturing! Enuff la..ive learnt my lesson. Can I have a 2nd chance plz. Its been a week benda tuh dah jadi kan, so, what’s is the use of crying over split milk?i know la that 7250i tuh expensive, n since rite now our family financial is not stable enough, its so pathetic to lose that hp. I just want them to know and proud that im not the old salwani. I mean, I’ve changed a little bit. I learnt to be more responsible. I think that value is more valuable than what I’ve learnt in geography bout climate n etc. I learnt to be an adult mum, dad.

Each and every child in this world want to make their parents proud of them, and so do i. With so many things n challenges I have to face this year, which somehow turned my life upside down, there’s not so much thing I can show my parents to make them proud of having me as their daughter. If before, I can make them happy by showing them my results but now I cannot do so since im doing badly in ausmat. With my horrendous transition state I experienced in intec, I felt that this year Ive been burdening them so much. Sometimes I felt guilty to my family coz they’ve been trying so hard n try to do the best they can just to make sure that im not going through such a depressed life in intec. But they way I pay them is by showing my bad result n losing hp. Sometimes, I frustrated of being myself.I give up.Give up to continue myself with this way and thank god, sebaik aku tak terpk nak suicide lg. huhu. No doubt this year is a tough year for me. There is so much things I had to cope with. While most of my frenz out there, is having such a gud time hang out in KLCC or playing bowling in MID or perhaps watch movies over n over again in sunway, I was stranded in INTEC. Having a difficult time to suit myself in new environment and living such a hectic life. Can u ever imagine, class from 8-6 everyday. Oh…kat semashur dlu pon takde r teruk mcm nih. N worse, although I’ve put so much effort on my study(hoho. Aku rasa mcm 10X ganda rajin compared masa kat semashur dlu), but still end up getting low B and if worse C. Pastuh ngan peer pressure lg. but this time pressure of having frenzy yg almost 99.9% of them bapak rajin macam izat n mai or having an Einstein’s brain inside their skull. Oh..i felt so left behind in many ways, including my studies n social life. Yet, my family was never left me behind. They owez b there for me. They will support me in any ways. (Including my idea of changing course).I feel safe n contented by their love. Thank you Allah for giving me such a caring family.

But now..i’ve ruined it. I’ve ruined everything. I just don’t know what more I can do to overcome this situation. I want to have back the feeling of being so contented and relief like I felt before..coz rite now im lost. I feel like something is missing. And being at home is not the same as before. Im in such turmoil n the pain inside is unbearable. I just hope that somehow, someday, it will be better. Hoping that the time is not that long. (sigh….) aiyaiyai…asal cam edisi blues nih?

takpela..sekali sekala. kan aku dah kata jgn baca. adoi…

HELP!HELP!..i just cannot help myself to stop blogging. Each n every second, i will have idea of a new post. aiyak…smpai t’bw2 dlm mimpi tuh…aku dah wat byk gle post. bgn2, la…br 2 je post. hampeh…NANI!!! is there any cure for this illness? im so addicted! oh man….. herm..i would like to share with u some facts about myself, in case u guys dont really know who i am.ahaks!

1.cannot touch,see,or do anything with onions, shallots, garlics or anything related to them

herm…this is the problem. every1 knows that onions n its family is playing a major role in cooking. without this ingredient ur cooking will be something different, something missing n yeah…tak sdp! so, how am i going to cook delicious foods if everytime i see or smell shallots, i will feel like vomiting!!(dah penah pon termuntah.tu kes yg tak thn sgt la…) huhu. ive been trying so many times to overcome this problem such as hold my breath whenever i have to peel its skin or anything to do with it. but…never succeed.as a last resort, my mom awl2 dah blend all the shallots,onions n garlic n placed it in tupperware. so, whenever i feel like cooking, its already there in fridge.i dont know y this happened to me. its like mcm shallots tu maggots yg kat dlm fearfactor tuh.n whenever i haf to deal with shallots,rasa mcm ngah masuk fearfactor je.. yeah..teruknya anggap food disgusting mcm tuh. tp…like i say, i just cannot help myself. Sbb tu la..kalo ada kenduri ke apa, rasa malas gle nak tlg kat dapur. coz the common task they usually ask teenagers to do is to peel off the shallot’s skins.aiyak….

p/s: but i do like the smell when garlic is being fried.kira mcm nak masak tumis la..

2. FEAR OF LEECHES, WORMS N ANYTHING RELATED TO THEM

ok..attention, this is not the issue of GELI. seriously this is the issue of fear,phobia and might contribute to death. haha.exaggerate gle!ok. maybe guys dont really understand about this fear like girls do.thus,even some of them enjoy making fun of us with this animals.tp this kind of animals is totally disgusting to us n we just cannot bear with it. even, i myself hampir2 nak pitam when i found out there is an ENORMOUS leech sucking up my blood during camping ketua2 pengws district level when i was in standard 6.(act that is the ONLY time entire my life kena gigit ngan leech, but the impact??? is so TERRIBLE!!!smpai skang tak leh lupa!). ok, down ere is little facts bout my fren n animals they scared of.

• nani-butterfly
• ateqs-serangga kecik lbh2 lg kalo serangga ijau yg byk gle kat semashur tuh
• housemates intec-cockroach
• aiman n oya -lizard

P/S: although i hate leech n worms but i do enjoy jungle trekking n stuff. so, i dun mind pakai socks kat luar track bottom like we always do in our primary school days.

3. ive never eat nasi lemak with its sambal.

hehe. all of u must be thinking,"la..apa nikmat makan nasi lemak without sambal?" yeah i know. sambal la actually determined whether the nasi lemak is delicious or not. But i cannot eat them.accurately, im scared of eating sambal. first, becoz the red colour of the sambal n second is becoz usually there are onions in that sambal.aiyak…its not that i cannot eat hot n spicy food, but…im just scared. pelikkan?scared with red colour yg menyala2. hoho. but ironically, i like red. i feel so energetic when im wearing red.but when it comes to food, my appetite suddenly disappeared. vanish…(but not all the time la. if im so starving, anything would be just yumm yumm!:D)

" You can complain besause roses have thorns or you can rejoice because thorns have roses" 

Haha. now, i think i know exactly what is the meaning of this quotes. well, after few BAD things happened to me this couple of days, i started to have a different perception towards life. herm…its pretty hard to describe what life is all about coz its too subjective. but to me, clearly, life is a journey, where u r heading to a destination, but along the way, there will b lots of circumstances occur, n not to neglect, sometimes u will encounter valuable lessons.(adoi…haha. aku tahu kalo 9 baca nih, sure dia ckp…"bosan, membebel, tak best". ) so, i guessed i better stop ere n continue to what im going to write about. yes, to write bout the day when everything seems wrong. pergh…kalo kuar esei spm, sure aku skor A1 nye la coz the bad things is so…..INTOLERABLE!!

17th May 2006. Entire my life i will never ever forget this day. its not just about what had happened to me, but also the valuable lesson i learned that day. yup, its d day when we, fast track petronas in intec decided to spent our time together after a horrensdous (this is what i feel la…) exam week. We went to GENTING!!!yeeha!! the euphoria can be easily recognized. Every1 is so happy but im sure aliyas is the most excited person coz it was his first time though…(n of course with esther being his partner there.ceh, tak penah berenggang! :D)

1st, we went to ghost house. Eerie, spooky, scary….duh..yoyo jer. my advise, not worth it beratur panjang2 tunggu nak masuk rumah hantu kat genting. takder mender pon. thank god that day is working day n we dun haf to wait so long for just a 3 minute ride in a bosan gle umah hntu.. next, i went on solero shot n go kart. herm, this time is pretty cool. haha. sitting next to danni who is totally nervous that day, keep saying, "oh my god.i dont think i can make it.this is insane!" haha. n finally congrates danni! u finally make it! best kan??being weigthless for 1 minute, hey, ok la tuh. tak dpt jd kurus, dpt rasa jd kurus enuff la.ahaks!

we took a break after playing go kart for zohor prayer n the moment of unbearable pain is just about to start.i went to the toilet nearby since there was no place for muslimah to take their ablution.when i was in toilet, the spectacles that hung from the collar of my shirt suddenly fell into the toilet bowl,and unfortunately,there was nothing i could do to salvage them.To make it worse, the toilet bowl was the type that seemingly led straight down into an abyss,making it impossible for me to scoop out my specs.huhu. i was speechless. oh come on! i just bought the spec early this year n i used it with my own money!!! n its so hard to find spec that suits me well. n now? the spec is peacefully "bersemadi" with all those grossy things kat genting???that is so ridiculous! huhu…there;s nothing i can do except, "ok…just let it go..ada hikmah…"although deep inside, i still cannot accept it. huhu.nvm.

ok to make it short. After maghrib prayer, when i was checking my hp inside my handbag and pocket, it wasnt there! seriously! check byk2 kali pon takde gak. takde weh! huhu. cane nih?? plz dont say i lost my hp as well. after the loss of my spec, then now hp??GREAT! This is totally great. im blank! speechless for the second time. and at that time i can imagine d faces of my parents. there’s no anger but more to dissapointment. how i took things for granted. how irresponsible i was in taking care of my things n how ungrateful i was of having hp since the morib incident (where i carelessly main kayak dgn bwk hp smpai 3310 yg aku jaga 4 almost 5 years rosak masuk air!huhu)

N sah, my hp kena picpocket! huhu. im sad?OF COURSE!! but surprisingly, im not crying. tak menangis lgsng!! (take note ek hafiz n chicha! aku tak spt yg dijangkakan korg! )HAHA. can u ever imagine that? dlm malang yg menimpa berturut2 tuh, i was like pasrah n redha gle..hey! im improving myself! ateqs!aijud! dont u guys proud of me?? i think now ive learned how to be an adult. to manage my problem rationally. haha.(uwekk!! poyo seyh!)

but in this post, what i want to highlight here is, after all that happened to me that day, i was touched by the effort of my frenz,my new frenz which most of them, i only knew for only 5 months. All of them generously wat derma kilat 4 me . huhu.seriously, i was so touch! thanks frenz! those money im going to spend it to buy my new spec.thank u so much! after this, aku boleh melihat sebab korang tau! haha. bangga tak? now i realize frenship is nothing to do with how long u’ve known them but its about how u really appreciate it.

n those my semashurian frenz, thanks 4 all ur moral support.kata2 semangat korng wat aku bersemangat nak teruskan idup. ecece. (haha.fizah n ateqs sure tahu mcm mana tak keruan nye aku without hp.). ok2. i know u guys dah bored to read my blabbering. so, i’ll better stop now.haha.

p/s: nani u r totally rite. blogging can be so addictive!

ATTENTION! ATTENTION! ATTENTION!

Ok! take note everyone! on this glorious day of 20th of may 2006, finally, salwani managed to launch her own blog! clap3! phew…it takes me bout 5 months i think since aijud suggested me to have my own blog. i still remember his words,some kind like this, "ey sal! u too shud haf ur own blog. its a way of letting others know anything happened to u n keep in touch with them. So, although u r in intec n im in sunway, i will know ur latest story," hehe. N within these period of time, i realize bunch of my frens have started to have their own blog, writing their frustration, memorable event in their life n not to forget crappy little things which somehow impressively managed to made me laugh like a mad little gurl. Even fatin nadiah n 9 have their own blog. (no offence ere. its just suddenly ur guys names popped up into my head :D)

so, feelin like i was left far behind compared to others and not to waste more time, there u go! the launch of sal’s blog! hope that with this blog, i can improve my english (like mr azmi-ielts lecturer said, writing helps u a lot in improving ur english) n therefore hoping to get band 9 in ielts.haha. can i?if not, at least get above 6.5 is enuff coz there’s no need for me to repeat for the test, which, if i haf to do so, it will be a disastrous event in my life! haha. sorry coz its just nonsense crap ere, but it is meaningful to me coz its about im entering a new phase in life. err….is it??dunno la…. ahaks! herm, so what ya waitin for frenz? gimme comment!